The beginning

To start off I would like to give a little background on who I am.  I am a 30 year old single mother to an incredibly smart, energetic two and a half year old boy.  He is my world and changed me into the woman I am.  His name is Trey.  I grew up in a small town in southwest Florida, with my parents, two sisters and a little brother.  By the age of thirteen my life started to change and I started rebelling.  My parents were separating and I as the oldest child tried to rebel and started hanging with a group of guys who were way older than me.  That group of friends were the ones to show me how to be BAD!  As my parents were going through their own changes, I took advantage and started to sneak out, drink, smoke and just do all the things my parents forbid me to do. This group of friends was a mix of white and black guys and I loved every minute of the hood lifestyle.  My parents then decided to divorce and I wanted freedom so I decided I’d go live with my father.  He let me get away with everything!  We moved into an apartment complex in the heart of town and i let my wild side out!  I was basically my fathers keeper and had to help him in a very grown up way.  I learned so much during these years in how to have street smarts. I hung out with kids that were in and out of Juvie and who sold drugs.  This was also the years that I was introduced to drugs. I dated older men and lost my virginity to my first love Evan. Evan was a bad boy who was in and out of trouble and I loved it! I loved the bad boys and I loved the crews we hung out with even more! This was my introduction to life on the streets.  I couldn’t stay away from these people! They were everything that I was raised to stay away from.  My parents always told me I couldn’t hang with trouble makers and I COULD NEVER date a black man.  That was their first mistake.  I wanted to do everything they said I couldn’t do as most teenagers these days do.  My father worked so much so I was alone most of the time and that’s when I started high school. I rode the bus the first day and at my bus stop were a group of kids standing together talking. I could only hear bits and pieces of their convo but I knew I wanted to be apart of that group.  There were about 4 black guys, 2 black girls and a Spanish girl. The Spanish girl was loud and talking about a friend of hers that got into a fight and her friend took a razor to the other girls face!! All I could think about was that I never wanted to be on her bad side and that I’d like to hear more of these crazy stories. As the beginning of the school year started I started to hang out with this group of friends. They were all crazy and fun and had the biggest hearts.  I made especially good friends with one of the black boys.  His name is Charles. You will hear allot about Charles in my blog because we are still best friends after 15 years. That group of friends were nothing like I thought they would be.  They were all good people who would be in my life for years to come. 

High school was one of the best times of my life. I started dating black men behind my parents back and I would get in trouble because of it constantly.  My dad and mother are raised in the south and unfortunately they def were racist.  My dad bought me a brand new car at 16 but told me if he ever caught any black people in he’d take it away.  For me that was a challenge! Lol I have not one racist bone in my body and so I did what I wanted! I would skip school with my black friends all the time and we would drive to other cities and just hang out up there all day. Mind you when my dad bought me my new car he put a name plate on the front in mirrors that said my name MISTY. Everyone knew my car because it was hard to miss! So skipping school and staying in our town was too risky! The funny thing is I’ve always had bad luck when it comes to being bad. I ALWAYS get caught. Anyway one day we were skipping school and we were in the city north of us. I have my best friend Charles and 3 other friends from our group in the car as well. We were jammin to Trick daddy dancing and riding when all of a sudden a big ford truck pulls up next to us. I wasn’t paying attention, and when I finally looked over I see my dad’s best friend pointing at me to roll down my window! Omg! I about shit my pants! Here we are in a city we are NOT supposed to be in, at the time we SHOULD be in school, and I have a car full of black friends that aren’t allowed in my car!!  BUSTED!!! My dad’s friend says “aren’t you supposed to be in school?” I said nope and hit the gas out of there! We were all terrified. Me especially!  I’m the one who has to go home and face my father. I’m the one who was gonna have her car taken away. And I was the one who father was racist!  The whole ride home I was sick with fear.  I ended up grounded for a week and my car was taken that long as well.  I didn’t care though. I loved my friends and I wasn’t going to stop hanging out with them because of their skin color. All through high school this happened quite a lot. I’d get caught with my black friends in my car or in my apartment, my dad would ground me and I would be right back at it. I had my first black boyfriend in high school and I’ve dated black men ever since. My parents got better with it as I got older but that will be in my next entry.


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